facing the past
my sister and I are communicating after 10 years of not talking. I’m not sure how I feel about it, and I’m taking it very slow so as not to get burned (again). The short story is that my mother was abusive and my sister (six years older than I am) got the brunt of it. When my parents divorced in ’76, my dad got custody of us, which was highly unusual at that time (and a testament to how bad my mother was).
My sister was wild and ended up doing drugs, spending time in jail, selling drugs, prostituting herself, etc. at one point, she was pulled over and didn’t have her license and passed herself off as me because she had so many outstanding warrants. Luckily, I was working in Tahoe at the time and was able to prove it wasn’t me, but that’s another story…
During all that time, we didn’t speak to our mother and only reconnected with her when I was in high school. I was always cautious, because my mother was/is the type of person that influences you without your being aware of it.
My sister had her first baby when I was a junior in high school and left him with us for a month while she disappeared, then came back and lived in her car for a while. All the while, she was close with my mother.
I, on the other hand, grew tired of my mother’s manipulations and told her off soon after I graduated high school. Then after a couple of years, I gave her a second chance. We saw each other for the next few years, and during that time my sister had two more kids (different father than the first) and married the father of those two. I met Mike during that time as well.
Then my mother pulled another stunt that was the last straw for me, and my sister was also involved in the events, which led me to cut them both out of my life.
Currently, my sister is not speaking to our mother (not sure how long that will last). And that’s the only way I can let her back in my life, because I will not let my mother poison me (emotionally) ever again.
So for now, my sister and I have exchanged a few emails and photos. I’m protecting myself, so I guess only time will tell…
My sister was wild and ended up doing drugs, spending time in jail, selling drugs, prostituting herself, etc. at one point, she was pulled over and didn’t have her license and passed herself off as me because she had so many outstanding warrants. Luckily, I was working in Tahoe at the time and was able to prove it wasn’t me, but that’s another story…
During all that time, we didn’t speak to our mother and only reconnected with her when I was in high school. I was always cautious, because my mother was/is the type of person that influences you without your being aware of it.
My sister had her first baby when I was a junior in high school and left him with us for a month while she disappeared, then came back and lived in her car for a while. All the while, she was close with my mother.
I, on the other hand, grew tired of my mother’s manipulations and told her off soon after I graduated high school. Then after a couple of years, I gave her a second chance. We saw each other for the next few years, and during that time my sister had two more kids (different father than the first) and married the father of those two. I met Mike during that time as well.
Then my mother pulled another stunt that was the last straw for me, and my sister was also involved in the events, which led me to cut them both out of my life.
Currently, my sister is not speaking to our mother (not sure how long that will last). And that’s the only way I can let her back in my life, because I will not let my mother poison me (emotionally) ever again.
So for now, my sister and I have exchanged a few emails and photos. I’m protecting myself, so I guess only time will tell…
posted by writnkitten | 8:31 AM
1 Comments:
wow, i'll have to get the full unbloggerized scoopy next time we have tea. good luck in the meantime.
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