i live in a small town

but, as john would say, that's good enough for me. and having lived in midtown for over five years during the bulk of my 20s, i do occasionally see people i once knew. for instance, today, when i was waiting for my friend at caf baf, minding my own business and reading a book when old flame mr. rock star walked through the door. granted, i'm sure he thinks he's a bigger rock star than he is, but since his videos have played on mtv, i will give him some credit. he was just as much a rock star 10 years ago when we dated briefly, but back then (especially when we first met) i had no idea who he was and had never heard of his band, something my coworkers at the time got a great laugh out of, since he was a regular customer where i worked (a bank). so in walks rock star this morning, looking very old and tired and incognito sporting a grizzly adams-like beard. i glanced up, because i was sitting by the door and do that out of habit, and our eyes locked for an instant, and i knew he recognized me just as i recognized him. and neither of us said a word. i've actually seen him around a few times in the last few years, both of us seeing each other and recognizing but never saying anything. i thought he was living in the bay area and married by now, did i read that somewhere or did i make that up in my head? and why do we never speak? it's not like we had some bad breakup or something. he went on tour that summer, and by the time he came back i was dating the man i'm now married to. we never agreed to be exclusive. he did send me a few postcards and call a few times while he was gone (i bet i could make a killing selling those postcards on ebay now!). and when he got back we went for coffee and mutually decided that things were over before they ever really started. and one of the last things he ever said to me was, "i really hope you don't write about me someday." like i was going to sell our story to the tabloids or something. well, i never promised him i wouldn't, but i never have--until now, that is. sorry mr. rock star.